Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Clear Liquids

I am just sitting here in the cafeteria as people around me are eating fattening, yummy smelling food. I have my jello (whip cream removed), diet mountain dew and jolly ranchers for lunch, since I am only allowed clear liquids today before I start my bowel prep in a few hours. We are waiting for our room in the hospital to be ready. Doug just arrived with a large hamburger, globbing ketchup, mustard, pickles, tator tots and diet coke, ugh! torcher!
We got a great night sleep! The bed was so comfortable, I don't think I woke up once in the night. So I am well rested, ahhhh!
We met with Dr. Foster this morning. He went over the surgery, he will start examining me under anesthesia and then taking a look inside laprascopically. If there is just too much that they don't think they can do anything, they will be done, and I will be home in a couple of days and getting back on chemo to try to keep the cancer at bay and not grow for awhile. If he thinks there is not so much that he can go in and do a larger surgery, he will possibly remove my omentum. intraperitoneal chemo, possible remove my spleen, possibly part of my pancreas might be removed, possible remove more colon. etc. This could be up to a 10 hour surgery, he said he could be doing surgery from 7:30 until 4pm or so. I am planning on getting him a few protein bars to help him out! Wow, that is a long surgery. I am hoping that he can do this major surgery. The ultimate goal is to get all the cancer out, or atleast as much as possible. We will just have to keep praying and wait and see how things go tomorrow.
When I get to my room today, I will get to drink the lovely tasting golytely, ugh, and get all the gunk out of my bowels for surgery. This is such a fun process! yikes. I will probably be heading down to surgery tomorrow morning around 6am or so. Early! So please keep praying, I need all the prayers now more than ever. Thank you all! I keep telling myself and god that I trust him and whatever happens is for a reason, only God knows that reason and the outcome. But I trust that it is whatever will happen is supposed to happen and be okay! If God needs me in heaven, I guess that is a gift, I must be important for him to need me this soon! Thank you all for following our journey and sending your messages, they truly help me get through this difficult time. DOug will keep you posted in the coming days. I may be in the ICU after my surgery and unable to write for awhile. Until I write to you all again, all my love, shawndra

PS. Ella... I miss you soooo much and love you all the time, hugs and kisses to my baby!!

55 comments:

Naomi in Georgia said...

Shawndra
I have been checking in today for a update this morning--- you are in my prayers and thoughts , I am thinking about you often now as I know this procedure is fast approaching....
GOD be with you and MIRACLES do happen, have faith and know we all love you- those who have become friends with you through this blog, and those whom have known you for a long time and everyone in between...
I wish I could think of something profound to say, but I dont have the words right now...
Just know we are ALL praying hard for you and strength for your family as well.
As you now feel a part of our family.
GOD BLESS YOU and BE WITH YOU !
All the best wishes your way-
Naomi

Naomi in GA said...

this video and song, always brought my Grandma peace in the days when my Grandpa was in the hospital and got her though her roughest hours, thought Id send it along....

HOW GREAT THOU ART
http://youtube.com/watch?v=DcF75h4BHk8

Anonymous said...

Shawndra
You are in my prayers and thoughts. I will be thinking of you tomorrow.
May god bless you and be with you and your family tomorrow.

My best wishes to you
Betty in Texas

Anonymous said...

Sweet girl, you are in my prayers....I am trusting you will do well and return home to watch your sweet little one grow up...God is so good....know you are loved and in the prayers of many from central Illinois...~~

Anonymous said...

Shawnda,

God Bless you all. I have been thinking of you all day today (you got all 6 miles today!!)...I am praying that your surgery lasts a long time, so tell your doc to get those protein bars ready!!!! :)

All the prayers, wishes, good thoughts and hopes for miracles are being sent your way, Shawndra. You'll be close to my heart.

Prayers to you, my friend.

Michelle

Dinah said...

Praying today and tomorrow and the rest of the week for God's grace and your strength.


Doug is indeed cruel to be eating like that, the least he could have done was have some lovely broth with you.

God Bless Dinah

Anonymous said...

Shawdra,
I have you and your family in my prayers and I look forward to your posts every day. You are so strong and positive! I will keep checking in to see how your surgery goes. Take Care, Cheryl N.

nancygrayce said...

Shawndra,

I check on you daily for updates and pray for you and your family! I ask God to direct your doctors and to give you strength for this procedure. I also pray for Doug and Ella!

Astraea said...

I am praying for a L-O-N-G surgery tomorrow and a LONG life ahead for you. You are an amazing and beautiful woman. Keep trusting in the Lord. He will never leave us.

Have a fun "clearing out"! I bet Doug would share his big burger, if he could!

Much love and warm Arizona prayers!

-Astraea

Anonymous said...

Shawndra and Family-

Our thoughts and prayers are with you! Keep Believing!

The Mudge's

Astraea said...

I saw these two verses in my daily devotional and thought of you.

~Cast all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

~If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all, how will He not also with Him graciously give us all things? Romans 8:31-32

Adriene said...

Thinking and praying for you every day! Hope the surgery is a long one...:-)!!

Anonymous said...

Shawndra & Doug,

I have been checking in to see if there was an update today. You both are in our prayers. Good luck tomorrow and we hope for the best results. We think of you both often.

Lisa & Mark Circle

Jodi said...

HUGS AND PRAYERS FROM LAWRENCE, KS. You don't know me but I followed Jenn's story and that is where I received the link to this blog. I have been thinking of you all day today and just wanted you to know that I will make sure the Jayhawks win while you are recovering! Don't ever stop believing! Jodi

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,

Lots of prayers are being sent your way! I will continue to check your site for updates. Keep the positive attitude and feel the love of all those praying for you!

Jennifer Teegarden MD

Anonymous said...

Shawndra
You are an amazing individual. You have great strength from within and from those all around you. You are a true inspiration.

I'll be praying for you.

Anonymous said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers tonight.. I pray that you will fill your heart with peace and that he will heal your body through the hand of your surgeon. A surgery that long, he will definitely need an energy bar or two!!

Dave, I also pray that God will fill your heart with peace because you have the tough job tomorrow of sitting, waiting and hoping for the best... Shawndra gets to take a long nap - it will be her one time to be worry free :-)

Remember that no matter what happens in that operating room tomorrow, God has you in the palm of his hand!!

kelley said...

There should be some unwritten law out there that you can't eat in front of someone that can't. It's like when the electricity goes out. As your prep begins and surgery draws closer, we will keep those prayers flowing! Your outlook continues to amaze me. As difficult as it may be to say, all of your comments have valid weight, and your ability to accept what will be is truely inspiring to me. I think you are pretty great, but am hoping that God hasn't been convinced of that yet and we keep you around here. As sacry as a 10 hour surgery sounds, I know that if that is the case, it means they are able to remove some cancer! That is a BIG plus! Until the next post, peace and love to you all!

Anonymous said...

Shawndra honey...Lots of prayers and hugs from minnesota. praying for the long surgery and recovery ...
love, julie (jill's mom)
ps.hang in there doug...long day for you tomorrow ...

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
Here's hoping for a long surgery tomorrow. There are a lot of people ready to help you recover.
Sweet dreams my dear Shawndra.
Miki
P.S. Doug, Stay strong tomorrow and know there are lots of arms wrapped around you. Thank you in advance for keeping us posted.

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
Here's hoping for a long surgery tomorrow. There are a lot of people ready to help you recover.
Sweet dreams my dear Shawndra.
Miki
P.S. Doug, Stay strong tomorrow and know there are lots of arms wrapped around you. Thank you in advance for keeping us posted.

Anonymous said...

I usually don't comment but want you to know you have been and are in my prayers. I should let you know that more often. The Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make His face to shine upon you and give you peace....and miracles.
God bless you and your family. So many are praying for you!
Elaine

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
Wishing you a long, successful surgery Thursday. Sending lots of prayers and well wishes your way. Keep up the amazing attitude!! Your are an inspiration!!

Tricia (from CMH)

Anonymous said...

Shawndra-I thank God everytime I think and pray for all of you and I will pray for all of your prayer requests being confident that God hears us and surrounds you with His healing, His peace and His comfort. It is so natural to pray for you for you are in my heart, as you are in so many people as evident in this blog!
Our thoughts and prayers stand with you in hopes of adding to your strength and God, we want VICTORY!
Love, Marilyn & Jim

Anonymous said...

The web cams are genius! Way to go neighbors!
I was thinking about the silver lining of this prep...it doesn't have as far to travel as before!!
I hope, by now, you have settled into your room and are still enjoying jolly ranchers (except the red ones, of course).
Thank you for telling us the details of all they may do. I know you are scared and so am I. While the recovery will be long, I am praying with every ounce of energy I've got that he will be able to get everything he can see and then some.
As someone else wrote, remember that it is like taking a nice, long nap. And don't forget you can ask for drugs if you have trouble resting tonight!
You have the support and prayers of the world behind you. Doug also has all of us to lean on and you know Ella is in great hands. Focus on taking care of YOU. Let us take care of everyone else while you are healing.
If I hear that you aren't resting and taking good care of yourself, I may be forced to send Nazi Nurse Carol up to take control and I don't think you want that! ;)

I love, love, love you!!!

Love, d

ps - Bahama Mamas will be awaiting you in KC - only $1.95!

Anonymous said...

Shawndra & Doug,
We are thinking about you and praying extra hard this week. Good Luck, and thank you so much for keeping us all updated.
Love,
Jill Dowling

terra said...

I don't know how to put into words how hard I am praying for this to be a major, lengthy surgery that will deliver the best odds for your future. Your prayer warriors have united and will spend the next few days praying with all of our might that He will watch over you and help you to heal and keep your family and loved ones safe. Best of luck tomorrow to you and Doug. Doug, keep us posted and know that if you are nervous, anxious, scared, we are hear for you to "talk" to...if you just need to let it go.

Terra

Anonymous said...

Hi Shawndra,
I've have thought about you soooo much today! I was jamming to that Martina McBride butterfly song in my car just now and thinking about you the whole time!
Lots of good, positive thoughts and prayers coming your way!
Hugs--
Shelley

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
I will pray the rosary for you tonight and ask our Blessed Mother to keep you in her care. I also will pray the Memorae. It goes like this, please remember oh most gracious Virgin Mary that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection implored your help or sought your intercession was left unaided, inspired by this confidence I fly unto thee oh Virgin of Virgins my Mother, to thee I come before thee I stand sinful and sorrowful, oh Mother of the word Incarnate despise not my petitions but in thy mercy please hear and answer me Amen.

God Bless you always

Anonymous said...

I'm another who checks on you every day but doesn't get to post much. I am praying for a long, successful surgery for you tomorrow. Keep the faith!

Best wishes,

Lori from Texas

Anonymous said...

Shawndra and Doug,
Rest comfortably tonight and dream of a new day tomorrow when God is able to use the doctor's as an extension of himself and perform the surgery that will bring the health that you desire.
Tonight, I will fall asleep thinking of nothing else and asking God to answer the prayers of the many across the country whom you have captured their hearts.

OhLookADuck said...

I want to wish you a quick recovery and great news from your surgery--our family will be continuing to pray for you. Have a wonderful celebratory dinner when you get orders for decent food again. Hugs to sweet Ella!
Karen

Anonymous said...

Shawndra and Doug, I hope you feel the strength of everyone praying you through this. I've been thinking and praying for you all day. LORD hear our prayers!
I'm anxiously awaiting the news of our miracle coming true.
I love you! Julie

Leisa said...

Shawndra and Doug, you are in my thoughts and prayers. May God be with the doctor tomorrow and guide his hands through the surgery. I will be praying that the outcome is what we are all praying for. May God also be with you Shawndra and hold your hand during every minute of the surgery as I know that he will. I'll be praying, praying and praying some more. Leisa

Anonymous said...

Wanted you to know I am just one more person thinking and praying for you and your family.

Paulette said...

I check in all the time and am having my own prayer vigil and fasting for you tonight Shawndra. I know you are in the Lord's hands, and I pray the surgeons are able to shake there heads tomorrow at the awesome power of the Lord.
You are NOT alone, I hope you feel our love and prayers.
Doug you will be lifted high in prayer as well, I pray the Father wraps you both in his arms.
Blessings

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
My prayers are with you.
Wendy

Anonymous said...

Good luck Shawndra.
We will be thinking of you.
Steve and Amy O.

Anonymous said...

My prayers are with you as you approach this big day tomorrow. Will be checking on you via your blog. Stay positive and strong, I know you will. You are such an inspiration to us all.

Ashley McCann

Anonymous said...

We cancer gals are tough "birds". I have faith that you will conquer this awful battle. God bless you and your wonderful family. Kisses to Ella. She is beautiful, and I know how much you must miss her. I pray you will have the long surgery, and will bounce back quickly. You do have your youth still, which has to help. I only hope no one in my family has to go through all that you have. You are very, very special.Blessings!

Laura said...

Shawndra, you always amaze me with your strength and positive attitude. I'm praying for you, your family, and your doctors. Take care, Laura

Anonymous said...

Shawndra and Doug- you are very much in our thoughts and prayers. Keep living strong! I admire you for your strength, faith and attitude. Godspeed to you and your doctors. xo Adriane

Anonymous said...

Shawndra--praying for you!!
Jill R

Anonymous said...

Shawndra and Doug-
I just wanted to let you know you have another follower who is thinking about you and praying for a very successful surgery tomorrow. Best wishes always.
Love, Christy

Tara said...

Shawndra:

It's clear you haven't changed since I first met you in 1997 at the A PHI house at Drake. Your strong spirit and positive, warm aura continue to shine. Hope you know how many people across the U.S. are thinking of you and praying for you. Your blog is magnetic; a true example of love, hope and sincere happiness. I wish you only great outcomes, Shawndra.

Best,
Tara Turney

Anonymous said...

Hi Shawndra, Doug and Ella

You are in my thoughts. I pray that surgery goes well for you today and that there is a successful outcome

Love
Dawn, Cardiff, Wales

Naomi in GA said...

was up all night praying for you~could not sleep, just wanting to know everything went well and your ok!
I AM PRAYING HARD, MIRACLES DO HAPPEN!
GOD BE WITH YOU SHAWNDRA, WE ALL LOVE YOU HERE and ARE PRAYING HARD!

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you this early a.m.. But really..."diet" mountain dew?!?!? You need the sugar for energy! I wonder if Golytley (which is misnamed I think) has any nutritional value.

Praying for your wellbeing.

Laura T, Adrian, MO

Anonymous said...

Prayers and good wishes for you from the Chu family! We'll be thinking about all of you all day tomorrow!
Beth

Astraea said...

Have had you on my mind all night. I pray there isn't news for awhile because the surgery takes so long. God is shining down on you! I'm pray for a miracle!
-Astraea in AZ

Anonymous said...

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,

“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried you.”


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jess in Nebraska said...

Hello!
Was up praying often through the night for you and will continue to do so until the cancer is GONE.
Thinking of you....

Anonymous said...

MAY THE GOOD LORD BE WITH U ALL TODAY THIS THURSDAY AM....GOD WILL GUIDE YOUR SURGEON AND KEEP YOU SAFE...DOUG, KEEP THE FAITH MY FRIEND....GOD IS RIGHT THERE WITH U....AND MANY ANGELS ARE HOLDING U ALL UP IN PRAYER....PLEASE KEEP US POSTED AS TIME ALLOWS...WITH CHRISTIAN LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP, YOUR ANGEL IN KC, MO....JEN MILLER

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,
May God be with you and bless you and your family. You are in our thoughs and prayers each and every day. We love you!
Mindy and Derek Nicholson

Kyrene said...

Good for people to know.