Friday, October 17, 2008

Irrigating ...bad

Hello everyone-I am typing from Doug's laptop, which really throws me off, so it isn't the drugs! I promise, if I make mistakes. I am doing much better today. Yesterday was a doozy! They decided to try to irrigate my ostomy since i am impacted with stool, lovely conversation. I hope you are eating your meatloaf right now. Well they put about 500cc of fleets enema in and boy did my stomach start cramping up BADLY!!!! So they couldn't give me enough drugs so they tried giving me something called Levsin often used to relieve cramping for irritable bowel and other GI issues. Let's just say, I think I found my first medicine I am allergic too! I immediately had uncontrollable tremenbling, shaking,shivering, I was so cold and I felt like I was going to pass out. My face was tingling as well as my hands and feet. I was soooo scared. I truly thought I might pass out and not wake up! I kept saying, just get a doctor in here now. That finally did resolve and I rested. But everytime I got up to go to the bathroom I would get that flushed, tingly feeling in my face and legs. Very aggitating! That finally went away last night. I am hoping to get to go home maybe Sunday, I think tomorrow is pushing it.
It has been very mentally difficult as well because they had to put in another ostomy so now I am trying to decide what to call this, a cow with udders or a rose garden on my belly, if that makes sense to anyone. This is very devastating to me, I was so self conscious before and frustrated to have to have an ostomy, now to have two is even more difficult. But I guess I will do what I always try to do is make the best of it and think, it could be worse. The doctor did say that when she was in doing surgery she found more cancer cells in my abdomen. So, again, I feel like I am fighting a battle I can't win. That is what superman Dr. Foster is for. I go see him in November to see what he says. If he has any hope. In the mean time, no more break of just taking pills for chemo. I have to start back on the infusions again since my oncologist doesn't think they were working very well. They did take out my port when I was in surgery because they thought I was getting septic (infection) from it. So they will have to go back in later to put a new one in, that is going to be around late October it sounds like. It was so nice when all I was doing was taking some pills and getting bloodwork once in awhile. Now back to all this chaos. Oh, and if you all didn't know, we are supposed to be on our Mediterranean trip right now. We were supposed to leave this past Tuesday for our cruise, so that really just sucks!!!! That is all for now. I was truly bummed I wasn't able to be at my Cousin's wedding and to see Ella walk down the Aisle. Amy you were a gorgeous bride!!!!!!!Wow! Thank you for allowing Ella the honor of being in your wedding. I will write more later, my soft food is waiting for me,mmmmm - PBJ! Shawndra

14 comments:

Naomi in GA said...

Love ya Shawndra, I know you are going through one hell of a trip w/this cancer, but I belive in miracles, and you are so tough and strong, and w/prayer and positive thinking..we are all going to try to help you as best we can.
NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP!
I would love to talk to you when you are up to it...you have my number, anytime day or night you can call...take care and please keep your chin up, I know you must feel like a bowling pin that keeps getting knocked down, but stand strong, and when your weak, GOD is there and so are all of us PRAYER WARRIERS!

kelley said...

Well, it does sound like it has been a trying week. Restarting infusions, unknowns, new "utters", just some really crappy stuff (I guess that could be a real pun!). You have had such a great outlook on things, always trying to find something positive at even the lowest points. We will say a little prayer that you continue to have that sunny outlook, that Dr. Foster will have new options for you and that we see a true miricle.

bahama mama said...

Rose garden or utters, either way you are still gorgeous inside and out! Thank you for letting us stop by last night. Kevin really did want to come (I told him no last Friday), so don't think I made him tag along.
You look great and I hope today was 1000 times better than yesterday. Next time we get together, I would love to see pictures of Amy's wedding and of her angelic flower girl!
Take it easy and please let me know if you need anything this weekend or after you get home.

Love, d

Anonymous said...

Hi Shawndra,

Count me among the people praying for you.

I wish I could say something other than that, but I don't know what to say that isn't trite.

Your faith and courage continue to astound and inspire.

xxxxxxxxxxx

jg in ca

Anonymous said...

Shawndra,

I am glad that you are feeling better today. Hopefully you at least have a good view of the beautiful weather we are having this afternoon. I know you are so bummed out about missing your trip and about seeing Ella in your cousin's wedding. The pics of Ella are absolutely adorable, as was the video. I am saying lots of prayers that you will get to go home soon. Know that many people are praying for you and sending lots of love your way.

Jennifer Teegarden

Anonymous said...

PRAYING FOR U EACH DAY DEAR SHAWNDRA, DOUG AND FAM....LEAN ON THE LORD GIRL...HE IS ALWAYS RIGHT THERE FOR U....THERE WILL BE OTHER WEDDINGS AND OTHER TRIPS....U HAVE TO BE WELL FIRST AND FOREMOST...KEEP THE FAITH....WITH CHRISTIAN LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP, YOUR ANGEL OF PRAYER IN KC,MO...JEN MILLER :)

Don MacLeod said...

Hey Shawndra

A coworker of mine has an ostomy. If he had not told me I would not have known. There is nothing apparent to anyone else about his circumstance.

The need for an ostomy might be troubling but just relegate it to a maintenance chore and get back as quickly as you can to indulging life’s happier joys

Hold Fast

Don MacLeod

Anonymous said...

Hi Shawndra,
I've followed your blog for a long time now but have never commented. Just wanted to de-lurk and say I am praying for you and so happy you are doing better!
~Claire

Michelle said...

Shawndra,

I'm thinking of you, as always.

I hope you get to go home soon. You'll be in my prayers, my friend.


Michelle

Lisa said...

Oh I am sorry to hear of your irrigation issues and the medication side effect. Yes...how scarry! I had an alergic reaction to Reglan once so I hear ya...it is frightning to be out of control!! I pray you get to go home soon. Never give up...you have a whole team here to cheer and pray you through this!

The pics and video of Ella are just precious! She is such a mini-you!

Anonymous said...

Shawndra, Keep up your positive thoughts! You are the bravest person I have ever "known". The photo of your daughter dancing at the wedding is precious - what a party girl. You will beat this "monster" and go back to being the best mother ever:) Dr. Foster will find a way.

I pray every day for you and your family.

Anonymous said...

You are truly an amazing woman!!! Unbelievelable!

You will forever be in our thoughts and prayers...keep up the fight!!!

Naomi in GA said...

Shawndra
to wake up today w/a personal email meant so much to me, please dont worry about my health, worry about getting yourself strong....
I am here for you, you know that! I want to be more involvedin helping you where I can fundraising, or raising awareness of your battle and gain more prayer warriors whatever you need.
I emailed you back, call me when you can and feel up to it.
Love ya girl, feels like you are my sister in all of this and I apprecate your concern for me, but please Lets just keep focus on you and getting this cancer out of your body..lean on us and lean on GOD we are all pullin for you!

Anonymous said...

Shawndra, I have not posted in a while but I talk to you through my morning coffee everyday. I have a little prayer for you and marvel in your strength. This is a bump girl, you can get through this and on to healing. I believe in you and your ability to beat this. You are someone who makes me know what love and courage is. You go girl. I am sorry you have endured so much but know your prayer warriors are in force and doing their job. I love you. Melodie Chrisman